These are the questions only. For hints to research the questions in the book, go to the questions with hints page. Questions from the book are marked with an *. If you have any questions or comments, please feel free to email me at cheryl@cherylokimoto.com.
Chapter 8 |
*On page 48, Ted tells Shelly that she’ll eventually give up on their friendship if he can’t find his way back to God. Do you think God ever tells people to give up on a friendship? Under what circumstances? What about restoration? Can such a friendship be restored later? What does the bible say about that?
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Chapter 10 |
On pages 58-59, Shelly realizes that Ted has been a blessing to her even though he was usually rude. She finds a genuineness in Ted that she doesn't often see. Is it possible to have a friendship where you aren't always nice to each other? Is genuineness more important than kindness? Do you have any friendships that have involved conflict and even anger? What does the bible say about honest friendships? What does it say about how we should treat each other? Can you find any examples in the bible where Christians were in open conflict? |
Chapter 14 |
* Ted and Grandpa Anderson talk about forgiveness. On the bottom of page 83, Ted asks Grandpa why God can’t heal him of the unforgiveness he has toward himself. Grandpa tells him that isn’t a matter for healing, it’s just a letting go and trusting God. Do you understand what Grandpa was talking about? Do you agree with him? Do you find it harder to forgive yourself than to forgive others? What does the bible say about it? Is there any time you have the responsibility to not forgive yourself? |
Chapter 15 |
*Greg talks to Kylie about myths, specifically about the myth of the phoenix. What do you think about what Greg said? Can God really use falsehoods like myths to point to the truth? If so, what kind of precautions do we need to take when we use them? What does the bible say about this subject? Does it tell us that “the devil doesn’t have an original thought” (pg. 90)? |
Chapter 17 |
On page 104, Greg says that Ted thinks he's bigger than God. What do you think about Greg's explanation? When we refuse to forgive ourselves, are we saying we're bigger than God's grace? Do we have the responsibility to forgive ourselves for every sin? Explore what the bible says about forgiveness. |
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On page 127, Ted calls Dave. It's May and he ran away from home back in October. For seven months he's hidden from his family and his best friend, but when he calls and tells Dave "I need you," Dave comes without an explanation for why Ted left or why he needs help now. Do you think that kind of friendship is good or bad? Can it be good for some people but bad for others? What are some of the elements of Dave and Ted's story that help you decide whether their friendship is generally a very healthy one or is abusive on one side or the other? Can you find examples of that kind of sacrificial friendship in the bible? What about broken (or at least seriously damaged) friendships that were later restored? |
Chapter 22 |
*The central theme of this book is the cord of three strands in Ecclesiastes. In Chapter 22, Dave and Ted talk about it. On pages 138-139, Dave explains what he’s learned about bible study and how it’s changed his interpretation of the cord of three strands. What do you think about what he says? Verify the information for yourself. |
Chapter 25 |
*Shelly (pg. 126), Dave (pg. 139) and Craig (pg. 155) all told Ted that Jason’s death was the result of a sequence of events, it wasn’t his fault. Do you agree with them? Do things really happen that can’t be blamed on anyone? What if it had been Ted’s fault? Would he have then had the right to withdraw like he did? Do people have to be punished for their sins? What does the bible say about sin? Is there a sin that can’t be forgiven? If so, what is it? |
Chapter 27 |
On page 171, Grandpa Anderson tells Shelly a story about his past that she's never heard before. She's shocked that he'd done something so awful. Do you think Grandpa should have told her the story before? Do you think he should have kept it to himself forever? What do you think children have the right to know about their parents and grandparents? When do you think they should be told dark stories like Grandpa's? Does the bible tell us to keep those things private? What does the bible tell us about God using our past? |
Chapter 28 |
On page 182, Ted tells Shelly that he can't let himself get more than "dangerously close" to falling in love with her. He is concerned because he's not sure why he fell into such a deep depression when he'd already been on the road to healing. Do you think Ted is wise to be so wary? Should he go ahead and fall in love with Shelly and let "love conquer all"? Can you find anything in the bible that addresses emotional healing? What about instructions for husbands? How seriously should a man take God's expectations for how he's supposed to treat his wife? |
Chapter 32 |
On pages 204-205, Calvin talks to Ted because he has withdrawn from his family, and therefore also from Dave and Shelly. Ted's afraid his sisters are going to humiliate him in front of Shelly. Do you understand how cruel family can be without intending to be? Do you have anyone in your family who you've tormented? How can you begin to change your behavior toward them? If anyone is tormenting you, do you think you should confront them? What does the bible say about correcting people? Does it give advice about people who are "bad company"? |
Chapter 38 |
*“The Bryant Curse” afflicted Ted even though he’s a Christian who doesn’t believe in curses. (See pg. 253 for the explanation of the curse.) It wasn’t really a curse. It is a metaphor for what happens in our lives when we struggle against God’s will. Especially once you see it, if you try to ignore God’s will, things will often go wrong. What do you think about that? See if you can find biblical evidence that Christians don’t fall under curses. Is there biblical evidence that God will use misadventures to direct our paths? |
Chapter 40 |
In Chapter 38, Deidra Collins directly attacked Ted, but in Chapter 40, she makes a complete about-face. She tells Ted, and Dave because he refuses to leave Ted's side, more about her past than she normally reveals to people. She makes herself vulnerable because she realizes it's the only way Ted will take her seriously. Do you think she goes to far in her attempt to make amends with Ted? Would you be able to trust a virtual stranger with as much information about your past? What does the bible say about our need to be open and honest? Can you find examples of where the Apostle Paul is incredibly open about where he's been? |
